In Italy, grandparents play an increasingly active role: when it comes to understanding how to organize the care of young children, the majority of parents choose to turn to grandparents. According to a survey by the Italian Society of Pediatricians,
over 70% of Italian children up to 10 years of age are usually entrusted to their grandparents, while only 5% to babysitters and nannies. Furthermore, according to Istat, the number of hours of help provided free of charge for childcare was one billion and 322 million in a year, mostly provided by grandparents. A nice saving. So are grandparents the
'family life preservers' of the Bel Paese? Indeed, their role is increasingly active, also from an economic point of view (the Assimoco-Ermeneia report underlines how in 2016 Italian families transferred 38.5 billion euros to young people, 30 billion from parents and 8 .5 billion grandparents).
It's not hard to believe that this is the trend. On the one hand, life expectancies are lengthening (83 years for men, 87 for women); on the other, the crisis triggers '
do-it-yourself welfare ' mechanisms, which also provide for childcare. Thus a third of Italian grandparents babysit their grandchildren: a very high percentage (in
Sweden only 3% of grandparents do the same and the percentage is halved in
Denmark ), linked to the lack of public nurseries and kindergartens and to the costs of the babysitters. Federconsumatori estimated that in 2017 savings for families who can count on grandparents fluctuated from 6725 euros - for parents of 0/3 year old children - to 8600 euros for families with 3/6 year old children, considering the kindergarten plus the babysitter for after school. But, frank calculations aside,
grandparents and grandchildren are a winning team , which builds an irreplaceable bond every day. We play, study and cook together. A freer or more relaxing relationship is created compared to the bond established with the parents, away from the work rhythms and daily stresses. Grandparents have
time to listen and this is what encourages a child's personality development. On the other hand, taking care of children keeps you healthy, both physically and psychologically. Anyone who spends time with their grandchildren is willing to
change their habits according to the advice of paediatricians and teachers (although, given their age and any physical difficulties, it is right to respect the needs of grandparents without overshadowing them), which turns into a stimulus. According to research published in 2016 by the journal Evolution and Human Behavior,
grandparents who take care of their grandchildren live an average of 5 years longer than their peers . Furthermore, the exchange between grandparents and grandchildren is continuous: while the grandchildren 'force' the grandparents to remain well anchored to the contemporary world, instead of living on memories, the latter offer the little ones pills of wisdom lived.
The trend of babysitter grandparents is so evident that some scientific societies and even some institutions begin to move
thinking about the need to update them , or in some cases educate them, on modern safety standards, on novelties in terms of nutrition, childcare, pedagogy, with also some smattering of socio-educational aspects. There are already several manuals and many websites on the subject. The question is, do we really want 'professional childcare' grandparents?
GRANDPARENTS, BABYSITTERS OR NURSERIES?
Grandparents. When mom and dad have difficulty finding financial stability, grandparents are the lifeline. Grandparents are also allowed what parents are not allowed, such as
granting a few vices and extra attention: the children feel it and benefit from these extra cuddles, without being affected on an overall educational level, because the
roles are different and also the the little ones know that what they can do with their grandparents is not always allowed with mum and dad. Parents, then, trust their own parents. However, it is also necessary to evaluate the effective ability of grandparents to look after those grandchildren who really require
a lot of energy . And, again, it is necessary to analyze the type of relationship that exists between the two families: if there are unresolved conflicts and a lack of trust, it is best to avoid this solution, because it would end up arguing and exacerbating misunderstandings, questioning the roles family members.
Babysitter. Reassuring figure that accompanies the child during growth, with extreme flexibility - think of when the child gets sick - and enthusiasm. The
exclusive relationship with the baby is especially important in the first months of life, but it remains an
economically demanding choice .
Nest. Sometimes it is the only possible solution for families, but in Italy there is a lack of
places in public nursery schools and therefore costs are once again a problem. For the child, the nursery means
stimulation and socialisation , especially from 18 months onwards. However, be careful of the risk of illness: in this case, the support of a nanny or, again, grandparents must be provided.
By Carlotta Cordieri | Taken from Being Born a Mom
